Devious Blondes
by MickMess
Summary: ChristianJericho. Three mini-stories revolving around one couple.
1. Devious Blondes and Shower Stalls

Author: Mick

Title: Devious Blondes and Shower Stalls

Disclaimer: The characters belong to WWE. Concept is all mine.

Distribution: Let me know and credit me.

Rating: PG for light slash

Written: December 3, 2002

As I stand here at the top of the ramp with Booker talking about the sizes of our manhood, I wonder why the hell I'm here. This is getting as bad as the end of my WCW stint. All I need now are those horrendous pigtails and a top hat. Why am I still here? Well that's easy. There's only one thing- Okay, two things- keeping me here: My contract and...him. You know who. The blonde god with his perfect body, gorgeous aqua eyes, and a great ass. I've talked, no bitched, nonstop to him for weeks about throwing the towel in. Then he gives me that look. That heartbroken look, complete with tear-filled puppy eyes and a pouty lower lip. That look makes me melt. It makes me pull him into my arms and hug him and kiss him. It makes me want to never leave him. So I'm still here, at the top of the ramp being compared to "Stuart Little".

After the match, which turned into a tag bought, he and I walk back to the locker room in silence. He knows I'm, upset and I know he's planning something in that pretty head of his. We lock eyes for a moment and he smiles at me. I smile back, even though I'm far from happy. He's just that infectious. It's part of the reason I love him so much.

Without much thought, we head to the shower room, ignoring everyone around us. I turn on a showerhead and when I'm sure the water is boiling hot I step under the spray. My eyes drift closed as the water soaks my hair and flows in tiny rivers down my body. I suddenly let out a scream and my eyes snap open as I get hit with a burst of freezing cold water.

"CHRISTIAN!"

He bursts into giggles and nearly falls to the floor. I turn the water off and glare at him. It's taking my strength not to laugh with him. I grab my towel and start rolling it up. His laughter stops abruptly and he backs away. I smirk and inch towards him.

"Chris, c'mon man, don't!" He pleads.

I smirk, "Don't what? Don't do THIS?"

SNAP! The towel snapped him right in the ass and he let out a magnificent shriek. I laugh giddily as he holds his ass in pain.

I smirk again and innocently say, "Hm, that must have been what you meant. Woops."

Suddenly, I'm shoved against the wall and he's spraying me with more cold water. Oh, I DON'T think so! I grab the nearest loofah and start beating him with it. He laughs and before I can react he's got me pinned between him and the wall. Our cocks are pressed dangerously hard together and his hands are planted firmly on my chest. He leans forward and kisses me roughly, his tongue ramming into my mouth. I gasp and run my hands up and down his back.

Abruptly, he pulls away and gives me a devious smirk, "See you at the hotel Chris."

With that he leaves the room, leaving me a sweaty, panting, horny mess. I push my hair out of my face and mutter, "Bastard."

He's in for it tonight.


	2. PreBliss Jitters

Author: Mick

Title: PreBliss Jitters (Devious Blondes Series)

Disclaimer: If I owned either of these men, I wouldn't be writing fanfics about them.

Distribution: Let me know and credit me.

Rating: PG for slash

Written: January 25, 2004

The music was blasting through the house. _LIT_.

The water in the shower was flowing steadily. _HOT_.

A blonde body was naked amidst it all. _Christian._

The house was empty thanks to work. _WWE._

Normally his gorgeous boyfriend shared the place. _Chris Jericho._

The two had been dating for months. _TEN._

Their special day lingered on the horizon. _Marriage._

Christian's heart skipped a beat as he counted down the days. _TWO._

Two days and they'd be committed to each other. _Forever._

The front door opened and closed, unbeknownst to Christian. A man was walking through the house, removing his clothes in the process. The man opened the bathroom door, a wave of steam and music greeting him. He closed the door quietly behind him and suddenly yanked back the curtain.

"AAAHHH!!" Christian let out the girliest shriek Chris has ever head. His face was pal, his soap-covered hands shaking slightly. Chris began laughing. He laughed so hard he had tears coming down his cheeks. Christian stood staring at him in utter shock for nearly five minutes before regaining his composure.

"You shit!" Chris' laughter stopped abruptly as a loofah covered in soap hit him in the face.

"Moron!" He leaned over and flushed the toilet, so the shower became momentarily frigid.

Christian let out another shriek and pulled Chris into the tub, so he too would freeze. Chris yelped and then sighed in relief as the water went back to normal. The two blondes smiled and kissed briefly.

They were in love. A blind man could see the chemistry between the two. They were best friends. Any idiot could tell. They were nervous as hell about the wedding. No one would ever guess. They knew everything would be okay as long as they were together. While the wait was killing them, they found ways to pass the time. Showers were a favorite.


	3. Devious Blonds and Hot Tubs

Author: Mick

Title: Jealous Blondes and Hot Tubs

Disclaimer: Once again, they are not mine. SOB.

Distribution: Let me know or feel my wrath.

Rated: PG for light slash

Written: February 23, 2004

I hate it that they do this to us. That they make us act straight when everyone, even the straight guys, know we've been fucking for at least six months now. It drives me crazy that I've got to pretend to be something I'm not. I grit my teeth and pretend to smile as I "flirt" with Trish. I pretend it's Christian I'm kissing and not her. Christian I love. Christian I married. Not Trish. I don't even consider her a friend, seeing as we only talk when need be. So all this straight act does is further the level of uncomfort.

Monday nearly ended it for me. When Christian asked Trish to "lay down" for him, my stomach churned. I'm not a jealous person at all. I understand that work is work and all that crap, but just the thought of Christian with a woman upset me. Hell, I hate to admit it, but I'm pretty sure we both took pleasure in his and Trish's "math". I felt kind of guilty for enjoying her pain, but really it all came down to being sickened by the story line.

After his match, I met Christian at the Gorilla position. We walked back to the locker room together, hand-in-hand. I was off, so I waited for him to change and we left for the hotel.

Once inside the safe confines of our room, we stripped off our clothes, filled up the hot tub and climbed in, his body reclined on mine. I wrapped my arms around him and kissed every inch of him I could reach.

"Chris? I love you," Christian murmured, snuggling against me a little more, "I hate pretending I don't."

"I know," I went to grab the shampoo bottle, but instead knocked it over, splashing Christian in the face in the process.

"Hey!" Christian splashed me back, sending water in every direction.

"It was an acc-"More water hit me in the face, "Oh it's on now boy!"

Suddenly an all-out water fight had begun. The once full tub suddenly began losing water quicker than a fat kid eats cake. Loofahs flew, water splashed, and everything was soaked in a matter of minutes.

We grew tired of the tub, so I lifted him up and carried him to our bed. Still dripping wet, I laid him down and crawled on top of him. We loved to play in water, but making love was the greatest of all. It didn't matter how they mad us act at work, we knew what we had and that was what mattered.


End file.
